When conflict is peaking: each child goes to a separate space. Parent counts to 60 out loud. Audibly, calmly, without commentary. At 60, both come back. The countdown is neutral and finite. Neither child 'won' or 'lost' the separation. The audible count gives both children a shared anchor for when the separation ends, reducing the anxiety of indefinite waiting.

How to do it

1"Everyone to their own space. I'm counting to sixty."
2Count aloud, steadily, neutral. Just the numbers. No commentary.
3At sixty: come back now.

Variations

Korb-Tür: If a child won't go to their space, point to it once and start counting. The tone says: this is happening. Most children move when the count begins.
Ausstieg: At sixty, call them back with one statement: "Sixty. Come back now." Say nothing else. No commentary, no apology, no explanation of the conflict. They come back to a blank slate.

💡 Parent tip

Count at one number per second. Neither rushed (dismissive) nor slow (punishing). The rhythm matters as much as the duration.

What your child develops

Finite separation — the countdown gives children something concrete to wait for
Neutral language — counting has no moral content; neither child interprets it as blame
Physiological reset — 60 seconds of separation is sufficient to interrupt acute emotional escalation in most children under 8